The Bridge

Communication skills are the key to being a social being. Humans are able to speak thousands of languages and dialects, however, I think their complexity in communication amplifies the probability of miscommunication. In developing so many ways to communicate the presence of miscommunication is always becoming more prevalent. As a leader, you have to refine your communication skills even more than the average person because there are goals that need to be met but also people that need protected guidance. Another thing to take into account is your image. The method you can use to determine the way your followers see you is by simply asking them or asking the people around them in indirect ways. Society has lost its normalization in simple questions asking because of the hypersensitivity and anxiety the newer generations internalize. Moreover, a person who dares to go beyond the normal barrier has the ability to hear about strengths and weaknesses as seen through the eyes of others. One good behavior and trait of someone who practices this simple and humane way of communication is the betterment of their own character. If several people from different perspectives identify a flaw a good way to deal with it is to try to change and practice something directly or indirectly contradictory to the flaw. I for one am horrible at this behavior not because I'm afraid of what people will think of me but because a clear alternative course of action is unclear to me. Similar to how Ned Weeks behaves in “ A Normal Heart”, I have a passion that overrides everything, and it's hard to steer away from it for the sake of becoming a more capable leader.

I remember one day I was having brunch with my aunt and uncle and I wasn’t speaking much but they asked me why I hated the world. I sat there without saying anything for a long time because I needed to gather enough thought to create momentum as I knew whatever I was gonna say next was going to be extreme. I told them that I had a difficulty in accepting my reality because even though it's great, it's a reality that could be so much more, it's also one that I’d like the people of the future to experience. I told them that if out of the 7 billion people on earth if the majority doesn’t want to sustain and protect the planet then none should be allowed to live on it. What my family saw wasn’t a person who was concerned about the planet and its people but an extremist willing to commit genocide for what he thinks is right. My speech humanized me but also clarified that I internalized very negative emotions towards humanity for jeopardizing not only themselves but every other living creature's existence. Although my point was valid and clear it was not well received because not many wishes to be exterminated or exhibit self-control for the better good. This could be biased but if it wasn’t then it's a perfect explanation as to why my reality is the way it is. I listen to my family members as they tried to persuade me to think differently but my mind only became foggy and dizzy with the overwhelming amount of effort the alternative methods would require.

Another time I chose to speak up about an issue was about the treatment of people with mental illness. I write and speak on this issue time and time again because it's an epidemic that is plaguing people of all ages. This issue especially in the black community is always disregarded as just a phase or something normal. I felt that many times I had to point out that mental illness didn't make my friends or family any less of what they are, it's unfortunate that it goes hand and hand with dehumanization, abandonment, and even being a failure in society. My speeches and papers on this also did not go well because it's something my classmates weren’t willing to accept and also something they aren’t ready to hear. I tried to be as transparent and clear as possible but it only served as fuel for their fear. I didn't feel that sugar-coating would’ve benefitted them but it would have made them all less upset for sure.

Finally, I spoke up about how I felt about standardized testing. I didn’t understand why students were taught exactly the same way everywhere and tested accordingly. I felt that many strengths were weakened and weaknesses were emphasized. A lot of my classmates and my principal agreed but I didn’t think much could be done with only my voice. The board of education in New York City is very stubborn in the way that they implement their educational systems which were also discriminatory towards colored neighborhoods. I was clear and my speech was compelling but I didn’t put enough effort to make it any more than just a complaint.

In my bouts of introspection, I recognize that I am more capable than a lot of my friends. I feel that I do have a general sense of right and wrong but much less compared to my group of friends because I live recklessly. I can control my recklessness but when my curiosity is involved my sense of morale bends to answer my unanswered questions. I am not as critical of others as I am of myself because my Aunt told me something very important. I was very upset one day because I couldn’t understand why certain people would behave around me the way they do and my aunt explained that I am more mature than they are. What she added afterward was that I knew who I was as an individual and so I was in the next stage of my life while others my age were still struggling to cement their identities. I know that I also have less of an inclination to stand up for what's right because I'm comfortable in where I was left. I feel that members of my community, family, and society have all done something to me to make feel so different that now I am indifferent to a lot of what happens. I am not given many opportunities to stand up in a reactive sense because I am never in those positions, I feel like its almost an intuition derived from all the times I've had a negative experience. I usually don't speak about what I would do in a situation until I'm actually in one so when I'm asked that question I answer with another question asking the other person what they’d expect me to do?